On Change and Gratitude

The breaking of the habit of anger starts with two words:

Thank You.

When anger has taken up residence for so long, eyes for the divine, the appreciation for smiles, the ability to give and receive joy is quenched, closed, suppressed. Where others see hope and possibility, the angry heart sees only doors that have slammed shut and evil intentions. It is a strange phenomenon, oozing in slowly, quietly, until the fleshly heart is hard and cold, a stone void of feeling and responding in love. A heavy lump of nothing, taking up space in the chest, making it difficult to breathe.

But a simple thank you, primitive, basic, desperate.

Thank you for the day to try again. Thank you for the mercy for another chance.

Life-generating.

And suddenly there is a pulse; a small blip on an otherwise flat line. Deep red river flows to cold, hard darkness, and precious oxygen is sucked into the lungs that have forgotten how to breathe. The first inhalation in a very long time. That which was black and dead is being transformed, renewed, brought back to life.

Thank you for the smile.

Thank you for the deep, belly laughter of three beautiful little girls.

Thank you for the little girls.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Blood pumps and flows, less constricted. The strained breath of before relaxes, diaphragm rhythmically flowing up and down, up and down. Life giving. Life restoring. Life healing. Life generating. Breathe.

Eyes for the divine are opening, the Father’s love gracing His children. Every bit of joy, every smile, every giggle, every moment of contentment and peace is the grace of the Father, manifesting itself in everyday interactions. He reveals Himself. He shows His mercy, His beauty, His grace in all of creation, asking if His children are aware enough to see.

See Me, That I Am.

And in those moments of awareness, I say thank you. 

And so a new journey of healing and renewal has begun, with a simple acknowledgement of gratitude, and counting of blessings received.

#1. Thank you, Abba Father, for new life.




Today I am choosing to join a community of grace and gratitude, counting the blessings that God has given. Gratitude will be the new habit that replaces the dead chaff that is being blown away. In the counting of blessings, I must be intentional to look for them, asking God continually for eyes to see and ears to hear.

What about you? What you thankful for? Have you counted your blessings lately? Would you like to  join me in the journey of counting one thousand, and beyond, gifts? 


Take a look over at A Holy Experience, full of beautifully raw and humble writings of a journey to God,  to join the community.