Monday, July 13, 2009

Faithfully FIt, Day 1

So, I have started a 40-Day devotional called "Faithfully Fit" in order to address the spiritual, as well as physical, aspect of my food addiction and weight issues. I am determined to conquer this issue this time around, rather than continuing to struggle with it for the rest of my life, and risk passing on these horrible habits and struggles to my precious girls. This first week's topic in the devotional is all about surrender.

That's kind of a dirty little word. Surrender.

See, when we surrender, truly surrender, we are setting all selfishness aside and following the will of someone else. That really struck me, because as I consider my heart attitude toward this journey, I had to confess that I was really skeptical about succeeding at making these necessary changes to regain health. Somehow I just really didn't believe that this time around would work either. Because when success hinges on my will power alone, you might as well cash in the chips and call it a day. Failure. That's how I ended up in this situation.

And honestly, the only thing that I could really think about when I pondered a 40-day journey to regain health was just about all that I was going to miss out on. Ugh! My heart is so selfish! In order for me to surrender this habit, I have to learn to sacrifice and set selfishness aside. But sacrifice terrifies me, as if I'll be missing out on something so great. What's so great about Oreos? Besides the incredible chocolatey love. But even the simple thought of throwing them out, removing the temptation, makes me uncomfortable. Why is that? When did my taste buds become such dominating features of my body? That's such a ridiculous notion, and yet they seem to be such a driving force for many of my culinary decisions.

What will I miss out on really? Comfort food? Dessert? How is comfort food really comforting when I hate the body I see in the mirror the next morning? Food is not my comforter! God is my Comforter, if only I will let Him be.

So, I have begun to make changes, in honor of Day 1. For the record, I have not had an oreo for two days. I feel like at the confessional session for a 12-step program.

Greetings. My name is Shauna and it's been two days since I had my last Oreo.

Actually that's really great progress. But I digress. So, I have traded out these:
For this:
And this:
Progress, right? And I'm not dead, nor have I missed out on anything, other than a few extra calories. It's a step, and I am praying for a heart determined, a mind focused, and a body fed up enough the with the current status to stay the course. Day 1 is over.

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