Thoughts from an Apostle's Wife

So, I am the wife an apostle. Truly, a real, live, world-traveling, tongue speaking, persecution enduring, Christ following, obedient apostle. His calling is clear, and his heart is totally sold out. So proud of my husband.

I often think about Peter's wife. I wish I knew her name, other than Peter's wife. I imagine that she was an incredible, blessed, humble woman of God. I wish I could be like her. I wonder if she struggled when her man was away. He was gone for looooong stretches. I wonder if she ever asked him, "Peter, where ya been for the last three years, or so? Whatcha been doing? Don't you miss me?" I wonder if she ever wished Peter would return to the fishing boat and bring home the bacon. I wonder if she ever wished for a more "normal" life. But her husband was called, and he answered. He followed Jesus to his dying day, and became a great shepherd of the Church in the process.

I wish God had left more stories for us(me) about women such as Peter's wife. I love the stories of Peter and all that he did in obedience to Christ, but what about the ones supporting him?What about the ones who stayed behind? What were their lessons? How did they grow and move in faith? How did they avoid resentment and bitterness? Whom did their lives impact in their quiet obedience?

I remember a letter that I had sent to my husband when we were corresponding before we got married. It makes me laugh now to think of what I wrote then. I told him that I was not the sort of girl to stay behind taking care of the homefront. I was a goer too, just like him. That's to think about now, as I was getting letters from him at that point in time after being taken hostage by the LRA in northern Uganda, being robbed in Saudi Arabia, being caught in the war raids in Uganda. Although I could definitely do without the kidnapping, imprisonments, and torture, I was sure I was a goer. Just like him. And so he needed to know that once we got married, I was going to be traveling with him. It's all part of the adventure for Christ, right?

Silly, feminist. Turns out women can't do it all. We're not supposed to. I have a calling as well, and a place and seasons to live that out. Turns out for this season of my life, I'll be doing a little less traveling, and a whole lot more foundation laying in the lives of three gorgeous and vivacious girls. And it turns out that this is an incredible ministry too, teaching little ones what it looks like to be obedient in servanthood.

I wish I could talk to Peter's wife. I'm sure she would have some encouraging words for when I am feeling pent up, longing to dream under the expansive African sky, missing my man when he is away. I'm sure that she would remind me that it is, in fact, not about me, and it is all worth it in the end.

I am married to an apostle, and tonight he is home, asleep next to me. And so I will cherish the time before I proudly send him out again. Good night.